|What? Like you didn't know that Easter falls on 4/20. Source|
Now, I understand what you may be thinking, "but I'm a part of one of the many sects of Christianity and that sounds like it could get sacrilegious real quick." That makes sense, I respect your reservations and your faith. But shouldn't we be able to laugh at our own beliefs sometimes? Surely if you believe in something so devoutly, nothing can shake that faith, right?
Okay, imaginary person I'm conversing with in my brain, I understand that even though your faith is strong, you still wouldn't enjoy someone poking fun at something that makes up a big part of your life and personal identity. It's like when people make fun of the tall and gangly to my face, like suggesting it's okay to recline a seat on an airline with no concern of the knees of the person behind you (be kind, don't recline).
I get it. I'll see you next time, devout Christians.
There, are we alone now, people who think it's okay to joke around about...Hold on, there's still some devout Christians reading this who are still unsure whether or not this is going to be offensive or not. What are you still doing here, devout Christians who are still unsure whether or not this is going to be offensive or not? If you're looking for offense, you're going to find it. I could get offended by Thomas the Tank Engine if I wanted to.
Here, watch: "If Thomas the Tank Engine is an anthropomorphic train, that chimney is expelling what is fueling Thomas. In other words, the chimney is Thomas's butt hole! And that butt hole is exposed for the world to see! It's nudist propaganda, I tells ya!" (Didn't mean to go all old timey prospector at the end there.)
|See, it eats in the back and then poops out steam. Image source|
See, offense is wherever you seek. But again, I get it. It may not be your cup of tea. Please, I urge you, stop reading.
|Could anything I write be more offensive than making Jesus balloon art?|
What are you still doing here? Is this hate-reading at this point? Is this the same impulse that drives people to read articles about reality television stars? Is this the reptilian part of our brain that demands we identify all threats to us and ours? This is the same compulsion that drives Cubs fans to still watch baseball. Do yourself a psychological favor, and stop doing this to yourself.
Trust me, this will do no good for anyone.
Oh, my goodness gracious, you're still reading this, anxious to get offended. Ah, screw it. How about you invent in your head the supposedly horrible things I was going to say. I'll be back in a few days.